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Found 7 results

  1. Well guys, it’s Summer, and you know what that means… That’s right! It’s time to complain about how friggin’ hot it is. I mean, not everyone has to deal with 100+ degree heat like I do (lucky bastards!), but in your case, perhaps it’s just not hot enough to have a proper Summer experience. Seriously, why can’t the weather just be on our side for once? Fortunately, you don’t necessarily have to be outdoors to have some Summer fun. Why not just stay cooped up indoors and have yourself a virtual Summer? Maybe not all day every day, but when you just want to get out of the insanely hellish or not-hot-enough Summer temperatures, what better alternative than to relax on the beach, only while chilling indoors? Well, if that sounds enticing to you, then allow me to share with you five games you should play over the Summer. 5. Dead Island In real life, I wouldn’t exactly call a zombie-infested island a great resort to spend your Summer vacation. Dead Island, of course, isn’t real life, so the vacation is actually kinda fun. I mean, didn’t you ever go to the beach and wish you could just shoot some zombies? I know I have. And really, you can go ahead and play whichever game in the series you feel like playing, as they pretty much have the same premise: being stranded on a sunny island resort with some pesky undead tourists roaming around. Sounds like a nice little Summer getaway, if you ask me. 4. Pokémon: Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon If you’d like to spend your Summer in Hawaii catching Pokémon, then great news! That’s basically what Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon are. Taking place in the Hawaii-inspired Alola region, these two enhanced versions of Sun and Moon feature most of what you’ve come to expect from the series along with some interesting new creatures to capture, including Alolan forms of a few Pokémon you already know and love. A few other things that help to differentiate this generation from others include the replacement of gyms and the inclusion of “Totem Pokémon.” Oh, and Ultra Beasts. All in all, it’s a great iteration in the Pokémon series, and a fun game to play over the Summer. 3. Dead or Alive Xtreme 3 Here’s a game where girls wearing bikinis play some volleyball on the beach. If that doesn’t scream “Summer fun,” then I don’t know what does. Of course, there isn’t much else to Dead or Alive Xtreme 3, but hey, I’m sure plenty of dudes are fine with that. Oh, me? Well, uh… No comment. If you’re a girl, of course, this might not appeal to you quite as much, but there’s still a bit of fun to be had aside from the, um, impressive “physics.” No, seriously, I’m no pervert! I don’t even like this game! PLEASE BELIEVE ME! Sigh… Guess this is what I get for including this game on my list… 2. The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker If your idea of Summer fun involves cruising the vast ocean, waves crashing around as you discover an island of Tingles (well, dunno about that last part, but if that’s your thing…), then you can’t go wrong with The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker. Whether you have the original GameCube copy or the HD version for the Wii U, this game boasts vibrant visuals, a great soundtrack, and some delightfully quirky characters. Like Tingle. And his equally strange brothers. It’s just an all-around fantastic Zelda game and one that really gives you a nice Summer vibe. KOOLOO-LIMPAH! Oh God, w-why did I just say that? Guys, I think I might have a problem… 1. Super Mario Sunshine If you’ve got a GameCube laying around, or perhaps a backwards-compatible Wii (or maybe you could remaster this game already, eh Nintendo?), and have yourself a copy of Super Mario Sunshine (seriously, an HD version would be nice, or at least an eShop download), go ahead and boot it up for some wonderful Summer-themed bliss. The game takes place while Mario and Peach go on a vacation to Delfino Isle and, you know, obviously things don’t go as planned. As Mario, you must go around the island cleaning up goop. I promise, the game is a blast, despite the somewhat odd premise, and is the perfect game to play this Summer. What are your plans for the Summer? Do you plan on going to a real beach/resort? Or are you planning on playing some games instead? Let us know in the comments below.
  2. Jordan Haygood

    Dead or Alive Xtreme 3

    From the album: Kaptain's Gallery

    Dead or Alive Xtreme 3 artwork.

    © Team Ninja, Koei Tecmo

  3. If you hadn't gotten around to placing a pre-order on Dead or Alive 5 Ultimate then perhaps you won't have to. Tecmo Koei have announced that their game is getting a free to play version later this year. Come September 3rd, you'll be able to download Dead Or Alive 5 Ultimate: Core Fighters on your PS3. As the subtitle implies, you're getting only the "core" characters. These include Ayane, Hayate, Kasumi, and Ryu Hayabusa. Although you can only play as these four, all the opponent still exist, as well as all their stages. Interestingly, some music will be unavailable. In regards to the game itself, you can play it in either single player or online modes. Free players are able to play against those who purchased Ultimate as well. DLC works itself into Core Fighters in standard ways. Each character is set to cost $4 and there will not be any multi-character packs available. If you want to play story mode then you'll have to dish out $15. As it stands, the content available for free may be just enough for some players to not need to pick up any DLC.
  4. We've all heard about games like Manhunt and Postal being banned in different countries over their insane displays of violence. We've also seen our fair share of games getting banned due to showing things like Nazi symbolism or other politically charged images. But things aren't always as clear cut as that. Sometimes they get hilariously weird. Just how weird do things get? Read on to find out. I must warn you though, we're going all over the map with the games that are included in this list. Have fun! Dora The Explorer Is Racist? While looking at each country's list of banned games, I came upon Argentina's selection of games banned for sale in their country. When a game like Rapelay gets on the list you would assume everything else would follow the same guidelines, but I'm here to rock your world (as long as you didn't read that Dora title up there) Yes, this game was ACTUALLY banned in Argentina Along with a Japanese game about rape is Dora the Explorer: Unicorn Adventure... a game that is decidedly not about rape. At least I don't think it is. I really hope it isn't. The game was apparently banned for sale in Argentina due to its stereotypical representations of Spanish people. Here's the problem, though. I've looked high and low for a Dora the Explorer: Unicorn Adventure video game. Other than a few mentions of it on a scattering of websites, I can't actually find it. It apparently is a real game, it just wasn't a good game. Not surprising when there's a sea of Dora the Explorer games out on the market right now. If you manage to get a copy of the game please let me know just how racist it is. Marc Ecko's Getting Up Gets Knocked Down The lovely and totally monster-free land of Australia has a problem. It is only one problem, but it is a big one. The country is facing a terrifying trend of virtual graffiti artists. These hooligans are turning on their video game consoles and wreaking havoc on the virtual cityscape. The problem has gotten so terrible that the country had to ban Marc Ecko's Getting Up: Contents Under Pressure. Why is this game okay, but not the other? Because its cooler, that's why The reason it was banned was because it glorified the world of illegal graffiti tagging. I guess that's a good enough reason for the game to be banned in the country... but what about all of those other games that have a graffiti mechanic? Games like Jet Set Radio and Saint's Row 2 include virtual tagging, but they're okay to play. I think there's something more to all of this. I think Australia has it out for Marc Ecko. Why? I don't know. But there must be some reason. Perhaps it has something to do with both his first and last name only being four letters each. It just makes the most sense considering the evidence. No Energy Drinks Allowed In Blood Sports Mixed Martial Arts can be a pretty brutal sport. The whole goal of it is to beat someone until they're just about to die or to break their limbs until they can't swing their jellified extremities at their opponents anymore. So if EA Sports' MMA is going to get banned you would assume it was because of the violent nature of the sport. MONSTER BULLS ROCK! Instead it was because of the game's advertising. In Denmark, there's a law against selling energy drinks. If you've ever seen an MMA event, then you would be more than aware that the fighters and arenas are all just giant energy drink billboards. EA was given the choice of removing the advertisements from the Denmark version, but decided to just not sell the game in their country because it would ruin the authenticness of their game. That's their story and they're sticking to it. Dead Or Alive Is Too Risque For Sweden The ongoing joke over the years is that the character Ayane from the Dead or Alive games is listed as only sixteen years old in some of the game's foreign manuals. While everyone just took this as a joke for the longest time, Sweden decided to make it official with the release of Dead or Alive: Dimensions. And by "official," I mean they banned the game from being sold in stores. I can't be sure, but I think this is Sweden's flag. The main reason the game was banned was because of its figurine posing mode. As you played the game you could unlock little statues that you could view in a 3D mode. You could also make their breasts shake when you moved the 3DS and look up girl's skirts in certain versions of the game. This included Ayane, the sixteen year old character. Sweden has some pretty strict laws when it comes to women who aren't of age, even if those women aren't actually real. Since the figurines were such an integrated of the game, they couldn't really be removed without a lot of work going into it. Instead of going through the trouble it was decided that the game just wouldn't be released in Sweden. There are actually a whole lot of banned games out there you can read about. Australia has so many that they actually got their own Wikipedia page for their list. I'm not sure if that is something they should be proud of, but I digress. What do you think of all of these bans? Are they for the greater good or just odd? Why not post in the comments below? As always, thank you for reading.
  5. Like most, I play games to have fun, at least for the most part. At the same time, I also don't really care about achievements and trophies. Of course, I know they're a good thing to have simply because they do add more replay value to a game, but that doesn't mean I'm going to actively go out and try to get them. But when it comes to special in-game challenges... I have to beat them. I have to get as close to perfect as I possibly can. I HAVE TO FINISH THEM! It's just that sometimes these challenges are so time consuming and difficult that the reward never really seems worth it. Here are just five of those challenges. One Noble Is Getting Their Teeth Kicked In When you play a Final Fantasy game that isn't Theatrhythm, there's probably a single thought running through your head at any given time. That thought is probably "Man, this game could really use some Dance Dance Revolution type gameplay." Well, your thoughts were somehow heard and implemented into Final Fantasy IX. Prepare to regret everything. The gameplay is really just a Simon Says sword fight. Blank yells out what button you press and you press it. Doesn't sound hard at all, right? Well it isn't. It's the judging that happens at the end of your fight. If you missed a single button press or even pressed the right button (just a little slower than you should have) then you could end up impressing 99 of the 100 nobles watching you. What kind of play has the actors yelling out every scene before it happens? You could have a perfect show and still manage to only impress 99 nobles. And this is the kicker, if you fail to impress all 100 nobles, then you don't get a Moonstone after your performance. This means you won't be able to learn Shell in the early levels of the game and it makes a future boss fight a hundred times more difficult than it should be. So your only choice is to go back and try again. Over and over again until you finally impress every single person in the audience. This could take one try or a thousand. You just don't know. But you have to get that Moonstone if you want to avoid a headache in the very near future. The Zelda Race That You Can't Win First, lets talk about rubber band AI. It's essentially a tool that lazy developers use to make people like me angry for no reason. For those of you unaware, here's what rubber band AI is. When you get too far ahead in a racing game, your computer opponents will shoot forward at hyper speed and ignore all obstacles. This is effectively known as cheating. But at least with this form of cheating you can still win whatever game you're currently screaming at. This same thing cannot be said for a race in The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time. A race against the running man that you can literally never win. I wonder how many hours were wasted by people trying to beat him. I'm okay with impossible challenges. That isn't the problem I have with this race. The problem arises from the fact that the running man will always beat you by exactly one second. Close enough to a draw that you might make the mistake of thinking you can actually win. And it certainly doesn't help that he tells you to try again. No matter how fast you are, you will never ever win. Even if you use a Gameshark or other such cheating device to stop the clock at one second he will still beat you by one second less. You get no reward and there is no point to race him. Electro Shock Therapy In Final Fantasy X We're back to Final Fantasy with yet another "minigame" of sorts. And boy is this one as fun as it is time consuming! *Note: Sarcasm doesn't translate well through the written word* This sidequest requires you to dodge 200 randomly occurring lightning bolts. In a row. Without saving. It's almost like you're really watching paint dry! You're probably already reeling back in terror at the thought of doing something so mind numbingly boring. Why even do this sidequest, you ask? Because it is the only way to acquire Lulu's Venus Sigil. Now, dodging the lightning bolts isn't exactly difficult and can be done in only half an hour if you use a glitch. But if you mess up even once or take a break or accidentally stroke out and forget you can't save, then its over. And also if you count the strikes wrong. Say you dodged 199 in a row and went to claim your prize. Instead you would get the reward below the top prize and have to do it all over again. Some Things Just Aren't Worth It Dead or Alive 5 has quite a number of challenges that just are absolutely not worth it in any way shape or form. No matter what unlockables you might get, you just can't make me even begin to want to try to get them when you consider the requirements involved. Oh, you don't know? Well you're about to. First of all, there are the game's many different titles. You unlock them from beating the game, losing too many times, unlocking a certain number of costumes, yadda yadda so on and so forth. There are also titles gained from using a character online 1,000 times. Every character in the game has one of those as well. I stopped having fun thirteen thousand fights ago. So to get the achievement of all titles unlocked, you must play online in 25,000 different matches. I don't really care about titles however, so let's move on to the rare costumes. There are three in total, and each one is more crazy than the last. But nothing beats out Lisa's rare costume. To unlock it you must beat survival mode about four or five times in a row to unlock the hardest difficulty. You must then beat 100 opponents in a row on said difficulty without being knocked out even a single time. Using the dumbest tactics possible I managed about 20. I'm never unlocking that costume and I hate anyone who even dares to try it. Actually Using the Wii Fit Have you ever gotten a piece of exercise equipment that you swore you would use only to stuff it in the closet and hope you don't make eye contact with it while you down that second case of ice cream dibs? That's what the Wii Fit is kind of like, only it isn't real exercise equipment and I didn't actually want it. But I have family members that did want it. And no amount of reasoning could get them to see reason. They wanted that hundred dollar chunk of plastic and I was going to have to get it for them. To be fair, the thing is kind of fun. Every gimmick is kind of fun though. Try it out? Quit being so obtuse. Despite whatever fun you might gain from a gimmick, it will always become boring at some point. Usually right after you realize that jumping on a piece of plastic for an hour just to have it say you're fat isn't exactly all that great. So now I have that really weird doormat sitting in a closet, mocking me about that time I wasted all that money on it. I can't trade it in because then it wins, but I can't be bothered to actually use it. And have you ever tried to get another person to enjoy something after it has called them fat? It doesn't work. What are some gaming challenges that exist just to enrage you personally? I know everyone has at least one thing that puts them over the edge and makes them want to figure out a way to kill their TV, so why not talk about it in the comments below? As always, thank you for reading.
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